boy.fail
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dear diary,

He really thought that was going to work.

A public confessional for the times boys were absolutely, hilariously, unforgettably not it. Share your stories. Read the chaos.

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Blush4 min read

Forty-Five Minutes Outside the Antieau Gallery, a Formal Account

We were supposed to be inside by now. The gallery opens at five. It is five twenty-two. We are standing on the sidewalk in Carmel in fifty-two degrees because Pell saw a sign about the roundabout cons...

By his plus-one, on recordMay 29, 2026
Lavender4 min read

A Field Report on the Surfabout Situation, Tendered With Love

Kieran saw the Surfabout listed on a flyer in the window of a coffee shop on Thursday and decided, with the full confidence of a man who has surfed twice, that this was the year. "It's a community eve...

By the girl who brought the dry towelsMay 28, 2026
Lavender4 min read

He Said the Sandcastle Contest Was Technically Open to the Public

For the record, I did not bring the shovel. Finn brought the shovel. I just carried it from the car to the beach because he said his hands were full, and when I asked what was in his hands, he held th...

By a woman who brought a real shovelMay 27, 2026